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Mental Health

Darkness, My Old Friend.

I can feel it coming, sometimes like a whirlwind; strong and fierce, swiping everything I hold dear.

Sometimes, building slowly inside; brick, by brick, by brick. Like right now.

Brick, by brick.

My body would tensed; physically they could feel it coming. My heart, beating fast. My lungs, demanding more air. My head, light and dizzy… My legs, shaking. And sometimes my hands, cold and clutches each other. Throat gone dry like withered apple. They, too, could feel it coming.

Brick, by brick. Today is not the whirlwind.

Brick, by brick.

I used to embraced it. I am afraid of it now. It cost me everything. It drifting me away, yet it protected me all these years.

All these fucking years.

Brick, by brick.

 He told me to give it a rest. Should I? Would I want that?

Who am I then, if it was put to rest?

My lurking shadow, my protector, my defender, half of me…

It is approaching now.

Slowly. Creeping, whispering.

Brick, by brick.